“The Draft that almost wasn’t”
After the 3rd, 2nd colossal, fuck up in the last 5 years in regards to draft prep, thankfully this is the last time Jackson will be trusted with this duty. Booking a cabin for a fantasy football draft in the secluded* mountains without Wifi is just inexcusable. *Secluded does not mean 3 other cabins within 50 yards as well as an entire campground across the highway. True to form, the present league members were still able to make due with the substandard conditions provided by Roger. Neighbors were so close, the family dog even came over to hang out for a while on Saturday morning! Luckily for the league, a responsible 2019 Commish candidate was able to point out the cabin doesn’t have Wifi weeks in advance. Something Roger denied, even going as far to say “Do you really think I would book a place without Wifi?” Well…. After making other arrangements, we were finally able to have a draft with Wifi, although that was also far from ideal. After leaving us in the dark to his plan so he can surprise us with something big and impressive, we were at the mercy of Roger’s schedule. This resulted in us arriving late, being walked into a dungeon that provided less cell phone service than the zero we were already receiving at the cabin and standing around confused while Gimpy MaGoo was limping her way around the basement of Cadillac Jacks looking for help. With a 12 noon draft fast approaching, we were finally able to get in a room and connect to Wifi about 11:47 local time. Then an even bigger problem presents itself. Where is the beer, Roger?? Luckily, Proxy-Matt was there to save the day. He would then make multiple trips upstairs to the casino bar to bring the draft room beer. Thank you Proxy-Matt!!! You da real MVP!
After all of this bullshit, the league meeting was very condensed, but still very productive. A review of the meeting looks like:
- League name/logo – Chris will talk to a graphic designer in hopes of drawing up a logo. A name more unique than “The League” will be voted on. Please present any and all suggestions and they will be voted on at the Super Bowl
- League split to Divisions – No time to present details prior to the draft. Initial reaction is a “No” vote. Will be revisited at the Super Bowl where a proper presentation will be given before an official vote.
- Toilet Bowl Changes – changes to the scoring of the TB was voted against. Toilet bowl will remain 4 teams, with one team playing it’s way out each week.
- Mandatory activity – If any league member is absent for 3 consecutive league events, he is subject to review. Does not mean the member will be removed from the league, but that is one of the options.
- Draft Site/Date – Voted yes to have the draft being the weekend before Labor Day every year, barring emergency. Locations for the next year’s draft will be discussed at the current draft and finalized at the Super Bowl. Leading candidate for 2019 Draft (Aug. 27-29) is a return to Vegas.
- Defensive players – Voted down with a hard no. Reason being we can’t change the scoring of the league because it will effect records. This was done all while ignoring the fact that scoring changes have been voted and approved in the past.
- Side Bet penalty – Side bets are broken down into 3 parts: the proposal, the acceptance, and the paying up. The proposal is made up of bet offer and a timeline to complete. The paying up includes the $5 payment to the dynasty fund and the completion of said task that was agreed to by the given time that was agreed upon in the acceptance phase of the bet. If a league member does not complete his duties by the agreed date, he will be forced to play an empty roster spot for the following week. First offense will be a benching of the defense. Second offense will bench the kicker. Followed by the TE, Flex, WR, RB, QB.
Thank you to all league members who were able to make the trip to Deadwood for an enjoyable time, in spite of all of Roger’s moves that could have derailed the weekend, and I look forward to another great year in the world’s greatest fantasy football league!
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2019 Commish Candidate and Current League Treasurer
Nicely said..and good luck to no one but me